Staple gun

June 29, 2008

I succeed at speed, not accuracy.

Directive

June 29, 2008

Movies make me melancholy.

Sticky

June 26, 2008

Fresh from a conversation about the evils of high-fructose corn syrup, I’m still a hummingbird for orange soda this summer.

Ew.

June 8, 2008

Singing Bags 2 just looks like a bad tablecloth.

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Plug

June 7, 2008

Oh, Snyder’s of Hanover Hot Buffalo Wing Pieces (Artificially Flavored Sourdough Hard Pretzel) you really are Bursting With Flavor. Had you more than 0g Trans Fat, I would still give you my steadfast love. Nnggmmm.

To: Obama. Re: VP

June 4, 2008

Don’tpickherdon’tpickherdon’tpickher!